Thanks to George Bush, my house is messy

I blame the mess in my house squarely on George Bush.

You see, I always straightened up my house while talking on the phone with my sister. I barely noticed what I was doing, so engrossed in our endless conversation that I was, that upon hanging up the phone a couple hours later...Viola! Clean house.

Then George Bush began pushing home ownership

...and people started looking at houses

...and real estate sales went through the roof

...and the housing bubble burst

...and her husband had no work

...and she had to get a job

,,,and we can't talk on the phone like we used to

...no more clean house.

That's my logic anyway.

Kind of like blaming my ruined laptop on my son's teacher.

The teacher who gave my son an assignment which required me to go to Walgreen's.

...and I walked down the candy aisle

...and I picked up a bag of chocolate covered raisins

...and I sat down later with said raisins

...and I realized milk would go nicely with my them

...and I set my laptop on the arm of the chair to go get some milk

...and I bumped the laptop which fell, ruining the screen.

So see? Clearly the teacher's fault.